Sugar anger

Whoosh. It's been a helluva week. I realized sometime today that I didn't have a headache. THAT'S pretty freaking exceptional. Aside from that though, I've been going through a "why am I doing this to myself?" phase. Physically, I feel the same (no bloat or any other common symptoms, at least not that I know of... All my clothes are too big already from my weight loss earlier this year), though I am definitely breaking out more than usual. I'm finding blemishes, painful red ones, traveling up the sides of my face, which is unusual. My problems tend to stay focused in the chin and jawline areas. I'm hoping this is no more than a detox symptom that will fade shortly. 

In the meantime, I've been exposed to all kinds junk that I can't eat this week and it's been HARD. I mean, it's all dairy loaded stuff that I've been avoiding for the past 6+ months anyway, but I've always had something else to ease the pain: a bit of dark chocolate I keep stashed in my desk, crackers, fruit, etc. I ate way too many cashews today in compensation. It sucked. I was assaulted by a whole day of pastries, cookies and other treats and I spent lunch surrounded by 30 large pizzas from my favorite local place and my coworkers happily chowing down as I ate tuna, salad and broccoli soup. I was in some serious emotional pain, people. 

I'm also having some trouble with the concept of SWYPO (Sex With Your Pants On) as told by the Whole9 crew. The idea is that you shouldn't use Whole30 approved ingredients to make the old junk foody things you love because the process is more than what you put into your body, but the emotions associated with those foods. Banana ice cream is clearly comfort food even if it's just banana and maybe almond butter. It's about the texture and how scooping up cool, sweet, creamy spoonfuls feels to you. It makes me wonder where the line is. I got this recipe for an alfredo with white sweet potato noodles that sounds delicious. It's not going to make me go down the dark and stormy path of gobbling alfredo everywhere I go and I'm mostly just excited that it'll be delicious. But, I'm not gonna lie, the creamy texture does sound comforting. Gosh, this is complicated. Only 3 more weeks.